Harry Potter discovers Fan Fiction
by racle
Summary: The summer after Harry's 7th year, he and his friends find out that Muggle author J.K. Rowling is publishing amazingly accurate books about them. There's more to it than they realize, though. Non-DH compliant
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

August 2, 1997----

"Bye Hermione!"

Hermione Granger waved back at her uncle and young cousin before rounding a corner past the security checkpoint. She had spent the summer after graduating Hogwarts with her only remaining Muggle relatives, her uncle's family in Philadelphia. Now, she was looking for Gate 12 at the Philadelphia International Airport. She was in the Muggle world for what might be the last time in her life; but she had her place in the world of magic. Looking up at the signs on the roof, she easily found her way to the gate and sat at a vacant chair in the waiting area, setting her trunk on the seat next to her.

She thought once more of her cousin. Her Muggle father's brother and his family had no wizard blood in them; nor did they know anything of the wonderful world of magic in which Hermione's destiny was seated. She was required, as one of those with the knowledge of magic, to conceal that same knowledge from the Muggle world. And she had done it. Her cousin looked to be a promising student among Muggles, and Hermione almost wished he could have come to the wizarding world with her. If only he had been a wizard, he would have done well at Hogwarts and as a magician in the future.

What exactly made Muggles and wizards different? Why couldn't Muggles be able to learn magic?

"Attention all passengers, British Airways flight 8133 to London is now boarding!" sounded a voice that reverberated through the airport. Hermione shelved her thoughts for the moment and stood up, checking that she had her ticket in her hand. Picking up her trunk, she joined the line of passengers ready to board the large airplane.

August 5, 1997----

An owl dived towards the open window of Hermione's bedroom as if dive-bombing, releasing a package onto the desk and then swerving away. Hermione snatched up the package and looked at the mailing label. It was from her cousin.

With some curiosity, she opened the package. The first thing she saw was a piece of Muggle paper folded in thirds. She unfolded it and read:

_Dear Hermione,_

_On the day you went back to London, I bought this book. It has been very popular since its publication, so I went and got it out of curiosity. But after I read it, I am now driven to ask a question._

_The book is called "Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone" and it features a character with the same name as you. But I also noticed that the description of the character in the book fits you exactly and has the same birthday. I also think I remember you mentioning a friend from school named Ron. There is a character in the book named Ron Weasley and the description, again, fits the friend you mentioned. The story is quite unbelievable, but I've sent you a copy of the book along with the letter._

_There's more to it: Sites are popping up on the Internet with more stories of you and your friends' adventures of magic, and most of the stories are conflicting with each other. I could show you next time you visit. They're mostly based on the book, though, so all I want to know is the veracity of the supposedly fictional book._

_Are you the Hermione Granger referred to in this book? Please read it and tell me if everything in the book is true. I do hope it is…except, please don't Obliviate my memory or anything—I promise I won't tell anyone else about this whole thing, I won't blame you if you really have been hiding all this from me—I only want to know! Is it true? Does the Wonderful World of Magic really exist?_

_Love,_

_John_

In shock, Hermione put down the handwritten letter from her cousin and picked up the book. It was a small, hardback book with a dark blue cover. At the top was written: "Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone." Cautiously, Hermione opened the book to the first page and began reading. She became gradually more absorbed in the book—and realized that as far as she could tell, it was mostly accurate.

It was only when she had finished the book that she noticed her growling stomach, and realized with a start that she had forgotten to eat breakfast. As she proceeded to the kitchen, it dawned on her that this book might have serious consequences for her own world—the world of wizardry. It was clearly impossible that a Muggle author's imagination could simply happen to be identical to the actual events that had happened at Hogwarts during Hermione's first year.

Someone in the Wizarding World was giving away the secrets of magic to a Muggle.

Soon after finishing her "breakfast" (as it was already almost noon), Hermione apparated down to the Burrow, finding Ron in the act of eating his lunch.

"Hi Hermione," Ron greeted her between bites.

Hermione walked up to the table and put the Harry Potter book and her cousin's letter on the table. "Ron, I think you should see this," she said. "It's a book about our first year at Hogwarts, written by a Muggle. I got it from my Muggle cousin in America…"

Ron, who was concentrating on his meal, had only heard "It's a book about our first year". He looked up, surprised. "A book about our first year? Who would write that?" He picked up the book and read the title.

"Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone. Oh, it's just a book about Harry," Ron said dully, "He is quite famous now…"

"No, it's not just about Harry," Hermione explained, "It was written by a Muggle author. And it's an almost exact account of our first year at Hogwarts. We're all _characters_ in that book, and as far as I can tell everything's right, down to the tiniest details!"

"How's that? You just said it was written by a Muggle. How could they know about our first year at Hogwarts? They don't even know there is a Hogwarts!"

"I know," Hermione nodded grimly, "it means that somehow, a Muggle has learned about our world. Think, Ron! This could be a very serious problem for all of us!"


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

----August 5, Continued----

Ron snatched the "Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone" book and started reading. Hermione flipped to several parts of the book she had marked, showing Ron the parts that were about him.

"Bloody hell!" exclaimed Ron, "There was no one else but the three of us! How does this Muggle know the exact moves I made on that big Wizard's chessboard? How do they know the exact words we were saying to each other? It's impossible!"

"I know, I'm starting to think that some wizard or witch who knows all this is giving the information to the Muggle writer, probably for a lot of money," Hermione said, "or else the author herself is a really skilled witch who somehow stalked us the whole year without us noticing…" Suddenly her eyes lit up as she realized a distinct possibility. "Wait! It could have been Skeeter! If she used her beetle Animagus during our first year, she could have seen all of it!"

"But Skeeter hasn't had any contact with Muggles."

"Maybe someone she knows does. We could ask her. And I also need to decide what to write back to my cousin."

"Huh?" Ron hadn't been paying attention earlier, so he'd missed the part about Hermione's cousin.

"I got this book, and this letter—" Hermione showed Ron the handwritten paper, "from my 12-year-old Muggle cousin. He doesn't know a thing about magic, but he does know my name, and he's a pretty smart kid. He wrote me, saying that this book was really popular in the Muggle world, and he asked me to read it and tell him whether I was the same Hermione as the one in the story. It's pretty obvious that I am, but it would be illegal for me to tell him that. At the same time I don't want to lie to him. I'm wondering what I should write."

"I don't know," Ron said, "I think we should really show Harry this, though. Some of the stuff in here is stuff that only he would know, like how exactly he got that letter. We could find out if some of this is made up, or if it's all true."

Later that day…

Harry snapped shut the book in amazement.

"Harry, did all the things in that book actually happen?" Ron asked expectantly.

Stunned beyond words, Harry could only nod.

"Okay, so we know that the Muggle world has a detailed account of our first year at Hogwarts. Now, what do I say to my cousin?" Hermione asked.

"What cousin?" Harry asked.

"My Muggle cousin who lives in America and now suspects that the book is true! Here, read the letter yourself and you'll see the problem we have." She handed her cousin's letter to Harry, with Ron reading over his shoulder.

"What's the problem?" asked Harry, when he finished.

"Legally, we are required to eliminate my cousin's suspicions about the existence of magic," she explained, "but I don't think there's any way to erase all doubt now, other than Obliviating him, which is exactly what he's afraid of. The Ministry monitors all communications going into the Muggle world, remember? So if we try to tell the truth, we'll all get arrested and sent to Azkaban."

"Fine. Write to your cousin and say that magic doesn't exist, satisfy the Ministry, then when we get a chance, you can take us to meet him in person."

Later that day, Hermione was again sitting at her wooden desk with a quill and ink bottle to reply to her cousin's letter:

_Dear John,_

_I received your letter and the novel. It is certainly a quite fascinating story, and after reading it, I almost wish I were a student at Hogwarts. Unfortunately, the name and description of "Hermione Granger" in the book is only a coincidence. I do know of a couple of students at my school that practice Wicca, but if magic exists, I am not aware of it._

_Hermione_

She read over her short reply one more time. Then, satisfied that there were no errors in it, she rolled the parchment and handed it to her owl.

-----December 2, 1998----

It was now over a year and a half since Voldemort's death. The hunt for his surviving Death Eaters was ongoing, and would drag on for another two years. Ron, Harry, and Hermione had gotten no pause in their work and no chance to vacation, and the issue of the Harry Potter book gradually moved to the back burner.

Harry, Hermione, and Ron had all entered the Auror service, and although Voldemort was dead, many former Death Eaters were still at large. Harry was assigned to capture Lucius Malfoy, the most skilled of Voldemort's former servants, before he had finished training. As the years wore on, the Ministry began to rely increasingly on Harry, deploying him repeatedly against far more experienced and knowledgeable Death Eaters with whom he was truly out of his league.

While Harry and Ron were losing duels against Lucius Malfoy and failing to capture him (not to their discredit—even Kingsley Shacklebolt had trouble here), Hermione had been given a desk job at the Ministry. Even though she was fine as an Auror, the Ministry had seen fit to dull her sharp mind by forcing her to wade through Lucius Malfoy's Death-Eater finances. She was to figure out all the sources of Malfoy's 728,000-Galleon fortune, discover where and how he had hidden it, and attempt to calculate the (undoubtedly astronomical) accumulated back taxes the Malfoys owed to the Ministry. She was promised the help of Lucius Malfoy's son, Draco, a fellow Auror in the service; but she soon found that he knew nothing of his father's financial situation. So the work ended up belonging all to herself.

On this morning, she again sat down at her desk, pulling out the file folder marked "L. Malfoy Tax Return, 1993". At first glance it appeared very thin, but that was because it was magically charmed; she opened it, spilling a four-inch-thick pile of flat unrolled parchments onto the table. She flipped through the papers to find the bookmark she had left yesterday.

"Draco, do you really know nothing about the huge fortune you would have inherited?" she asked desperately.

"Sorry," Draco answered, "My dad only said we were rich. I never even knew how rich we were…He once said he would teach me how to run the Malfoy estate after I graduated school, but I think he got a bit suspicious of me in that last year. Actually, it is a bit interesting to see how all this stuff worked, keep digging."

Hermione continued trying to understand the papers. "It says here that your dad made an investment in a Muggle stock market…"

"Muggle?" Draco asked, clearly surprised. "And I thought he hated Muggles, didn't want anything to do with them."

"I don't know if he did. This form says that his Muggle stock investment crashed and it gave him a forty thousand Galleon tax deduction."

Suddenly an owl flew into the open window of their office, dropped a package to their desk, and then fled. It was another mail package from John Granger. Hermione eagerly ripped open the big paper envelope, pulling out a very colorful hardback book and a piece of Muggle paper. Hermione picked up the paper and read it:

_Hermione,_

_I thought this would interest you. This is the sequel to the first Harry Potter book I sent you. (I'm still skeptical that the "Hermione" name/character could be a coincidence, but without any evidence, I have to take your word for it. I know you have your obligations. –wink-)_

_The book is available in Muggle (wink, wink) England too. Go into any bookstore and you can buy a copy. Future books of the series will also be sold there—J.K. Rowling has announced that she will write seven books (one for each year)._

_--John_

Hermione put the letter down on the desk and looked for the book, only to find that Draco had already snatched up the book and was examining it closely.

"What is this?" he half demanded, as he opened the book and started reading. "It's some kind of a book about our time at Hogwarts?"

"Probably," Hermione said, "Read it and see if it's accurate." She returned to puzzling out the Malfoy financial documents in front of her, allowing Draco to read the book. She decided that she would read it later.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

-----December 2, 1998 (Continued)----

As Draco read through the book, he became gradually more absorbed into it, reading and turning pages so silently that Hermione completely forgot about his presence. Late in the afternoon, he finished the last page, and—like Harry before him—snapped the book shut in amazement, suddenly shattering the silence. Hermione jumped out of her seat, frightened, her wand at Draco's neck in an instant. She then realized who it was and put her wand away.

"You scared me," she said.

"Sorry," Draco mumbled.

"What do you think of the book?"

"To my knowledge, it's all correct, but I don't really know about most of these events, like Harry's adventure in the Chamber. I actually remember saying the exact things written here when I teased you—I feel sorry about that now, though. And that one time when Crabbe and Goyle showed some intelligence and asked me about the Chamber, that was actually Harry and Ron spying on me?"

"Yes."

"And you, Hermione, were stuck in Myrtle's bathroom for an hour looking like a cat?"

She nodded, feeling a slight bit of red color her cheeks.

"Wow. I wonder who wrote this book…"

"My cousin said it was some Muggle author."

"Muggle?" Draco asked, shocked. "How would a Muggle know all this?"

"I don't know. I was going to visit my cousin as soon as we got a break in our work—he sent this. He's a Muggle who lives in Philadelphia."

That evening, Hermione appeared at the Weasley's Burrow with book in hand to give to Ron.

"Another Harry Potter book?" Ron asked, not particularly surprised. "Is this one all right too?"

"Did you say something about a Harry Potter book?" Ginny's voice came out of nowhere. Ron and Hermione turned and noticed her coming down the stairs.

"Yeah, it's a book about our time at Hogwarts," Hermione answered, while sending a meaningful look at Ron. He understood what she meant perfectly.

"Oh. Did you write it?"

"A Muggle author did…"

Just like Ron and Harry before her, Ginny became puzzled. "How would a Muggle author even know about Hogwarts, much less write about our time there?"

"I don't know. My Muggle cousin in America sent me the first two books. He said the author was going to write one book for each of Harry's years at Hogwarts. Oh, and that reminds me—this book," Hermione took the novel and handed it to Ginny, "is all about Harry's second year—that's your first. Perhaps you could read it and tell if it's accurate? The first book was, but I haven't checked this one yet."

-----September 10, 2000----

A hooded figure, identified only by a few strands of silvery yellow hair sticking out of the side of the hood, ran full-tilt down Knockturn Alley. Civilians hurriedly backed off as they recognized a duel approaching. They made way as Harry Potter sprinted after the fugitive, raising his wand at the cloaked figure. "Stupefy!" The figure ducked into a store, and a red beam lashed out of Harry's wand, accidentally striking an innocent man in the street, who fell unconscious.

Lucius, in his haste, had made a fatal mistake—he forgot to notice what store he was trying to hide in. Harry dashed into the same store, searching for his target. The sign above the door was marked, in huge block letters, "Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes." As Lucius ran past the checkout counter and into the aisles, he became conscious of two wands pointed at him.

"Protego!" he shouted instinctively, raising his own wand, just in time to deflect two simultaneous Stunning spells. He turned and ran the other way, followed by Fred and George. "Serpensortia!" he tried while running, his wand pointed back behind him. A large snake fell to the ground from the tip of Lucius's wand, hissing menacingly, but at him! He looked up and saw Harry hissing at the snake in Parseltongue. The snake rapidly coiled and leaped out at Lucius. Simultaneously, Harry tried another Stunning spell while the twins each used a Bat-Bogey Hex. Lucius managed to block Harry's Stunning spell and banish his own snake, but the flock of bats surrounded him. Several more figures dressed in Auror uniforms stepped into the store, making a circle around the attacking bats and waiting patiently.

Lucius managed to point his wand at himself and say "Finite incantatem" before seeing the circle of wands around him. He looked at Harry, then at Ron, then at Fred and George—and raised his hands in the air. His wand clattered to the ground, where Harry immediately summoned it to himself.

The last supporter of Salazar Slytherin's heir had been caught.

-----September 11, 2000----

An owl flew slowly up to Hermione's bedroom window, struggling with the heavy box it was carrying. The window wasn't opened wide enough for the owl to get in with the box tied to its feet.

Hermione opened the window wider, took the box, and set it on her desk, untying the owl. It was another package from John. Inside, a note written by hand on a piece of Muggle paper:

_Hermione,_

_More of the "Harry Potter" book series has been published in the last few years. I've included the books that correspond to "your" (and Harry's) third and fourth year at Hogwarts. (Tell Harry that millions and millions of Muggle children are sorry about Cedric's death. Harry Potter's now a household name everywhere. The more he wishes he weren't famous, the more famous he becomes :-)_

_They're now out with a motion picture based on the first book (go into a theater in Muggle London and look for "Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone"—that's what they call the "Sorcerer's Stone" outside the USA). They found some kids to act in the movies—including one who looks really like you, and one who looks very much like Ron (the way you described your friend to me, anyway)._

_I wonder if you could come over sometime and we could discuss this further…or maybe you're a bit busy at the moment. Feel free not to write back if you think your owls to me are being intercepted. I know it's your duty not to tell me everything :-) But it should be safe to meet in person._

_Have you checked out the Internet fanfictions about you and the other kids at your school? I've read many of them, but more keep springing up. The stories about "you" are very interesting, too._

_Oh, I'm also curious: These fanfictions show a lot of variance in which character they have paired with you. I'm thinking of writing a few, but I'd like to know who you actually love: Draco Malfoy, Fred Weasley, Ron Weasley, Harry Potter, Professor Snape, or Remus Lupin? Or is it someone else entirely? I'm just curious._

_--John_

"Ron!" Hermione called down the stairs loudly. Ron was just then in the kitchen making breakfast. Things had come a long way in three years; the matchmaking efforts of the outside world had not been in vain after all.

When Ron appeared at the door, Hermione shoved the books into Ron's hands. He looked down, quickly scanning the titles.

"More books?"

After breakfast, Hermione read the two new books and once again discovered that the parts she knew about were completely accurate.

"Hermione, do you think we'd have some time to see your cousin?" Ron asked suddenly. "Now that the war's over…"

"I guess we would. Harry would probably want to come, too."

It was a quick, simple matter to floo Harry and inform him about their plans…except that he had thought of one problem they hadn't.

"If these novels about me are that popular," Harry had said, "it wouldn't be safe for us to be seen in the Muggle world together. All the fans would recognize us immediately and the secret would be out right there."

"True…"

"So then how do we get there without being seen?"

"I know the way," Hermione suggested, "After we get to Philadelphia, I can Apparate us all there. We'll have to be quick with the Silencing charms and explain ourselves very, very fast."

"It's getting late. Maybe we'll go tomorrow?"

"Okay. We should tell Draco, too. He'd probably want to know."

Meanwhile…

John Granger was alone in his room inside his Philadelphia home, pondering his next move in the chess game he was playing on his computer. After a few minutes, he decided his move; he clicked one of his pawns and moved it one space forward.

It took a few minutes for his opponent to move. He couldn't see his opponent, as he was playing on the Internet. Eventually, one of his opponent's bishops moved forward, taking a space previously occupied by his rook.

_Damnit!_ He realized that he was in check now. He moved his king, but he knew that the game wasn't going well for him.

"I suggest you move your queen," a voice suddenly said behind him. He swiveled his chair around, looking back in fright and saw no one.

"I'm right here," the voice said, still behind him. This time when he turned around he saw the gray outline of a person; clearly a ghost.

He screamed, but no sound came from his mouth.

"Relax!" the ghost said, "I'm only a harmless ghost! I won't hurt you!"

"Who are you?" John tried to ask, but he found that he could not hear himself speak.

"Promise not to scream, okay?" the ghost said. "I used a Silencio charm on you. I can remove it."

John nodded nervously.

The ghost pointed to John. "Finite incantatem!" he whispered. "Who are you?" asked John anxiously.

"Tell no one about me. I am Tom Marvolo Riddle, straight out of the book you recently mailed to your cousin."

"How is that—wait—Harry Potter is true?"

"Shh!" Tom held a transparent finger to his transparent gray lips. "Yes. I am the ghost of Lord Voldemort. I accidentally intercepted an owl from your cousin. It is very dangerous for you to acknowledge that you know about the magical world—the Ministry has special Aurors that go around Obliviating any Muggle who learns the truth. You might want to stop sending owls to Hermione, because if the Ministry catches on to you, you could be in trouble."

John nodded mutely.

"Now," Tom said, "You mentioned fanfiction written about me?"

"The stuff about you isn't as numerous as the stuff that's about Harry," John replied.

"May I sit?" Tom asked.

"You don't need to sit down, do you?"

"I suppose not. Move over a bit." Tom floated up to the computer, next to John's seat.

"John, show me how to work this machine," Tom ordered.

"Use the mouse to move the arrow," John started, "The keyboard types letters…Double-click the icons on that side to open up programs. That one's Internet Explorer…"

With the aid of Legilimency, Tom quickly mastered the Muggle computer and used wandless magic to press the keyboard keys and move the mouse around.

"Type in this website," John suggested. He reached over, grabbed the mouse, and clicked on the Internet Explorer drop-down address bar, clicking on a line that said "http/ After clicking on a few other links, he reached the page of Harry Potter stories.

"Click on any one of them," John suggested.

Tom clicked on the first one on the list, which turned out to be a Harry/Draco romance. He read it with a lot of interest.

"Hmm…" Tom thought aloud, "You Muggles have some interesting flights of fancy. How do you get these ideas?"

"They're not my ideas," John explained. "People all over the world can use the Internet to connect to sites similar to this one. All different kinds of people write stories and put them on this site."

"It seems like the majority of them are far off the mark," Tom observed.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: See the top of my author profile.

Chapter 4

"I guess Muggles aren't quite as bad as I thought," Tom observed. "They are very…creative."

"I'm glad to hear that," John said.

_CRACK!_ The ghost and the boy both turned quickly. "Silencio!" John was about to say "What the hell?" but nothing came out of his mouth as he saw Hermione, Harry, Draco, and Ron standing in the room where there had previously been nothing.

"So it's true!" John excitedly said, his eyes lit with wonder, but no sound came from his mouth. He realized that he had been Silenced. "It was just a precaution," Harry explained, "We were afraid you would scream and your neighbors might hear." Harry pointed his wand at John and quietly said "_Finite Incantatem_."

"I understand," John said. "Wow, I'm so lucky! I get to meet a wizard!"

"You do know that you must not talk of this with anyone else," Draco reminded him.

"Oh, of course," John nodded eagerly. "I assume you're here to inquire about Muggle fanfiction?"

"Correct."

"Well, I've only got one computer…"

"We can duplicate it," Hermione suggested. "When we leave, we'll destroy the copies so that Uncle Dan doesn't see them." She drew her wand and performed the spell silently, as they had been trained in Auror lessons. Another computer, similar to John's, appeared against the wall. After producing another three computers, the wizards conjured chairs and sat down.

"How does this thing work?" Draco asked in confusion.

"This button turns the computer on and off," Hermione started to explain, showing Draco the button on the front with a small circular icon on it. Draco pushed the button and a light blinked on. The screen turned on and displayed the familiar Windows splash screen. Harry, who also knew how to work computers, was giving Ron the same demonstration.

On Draco's computer the log-in window popped up. Hermione quickly typed something on the keyboard, logging in as a guest.

"This is a mouse," Hermione pointed to the small hand device with two buttons and a rubber wheel between them, "You move it around and it controls the cursor on the screen. Use the keyboard to type letters." Draco looked down at the keyboard. "The letters are all out of order!" he complained.

Eventually he got to the site and clicked on a story.

"Look at this!" John said, motioning Draco over. Draco went to John's computer and looked at the text. As Draco read, he had a strange expression at first, but soon he became unable to restrain a smile. He had to struggle not to burst into laughter as he called out, "Ron! You've got to see this!" Ron was suspicious at the mirthful look on Draco's face, but he rose from his seat and came to John's computer.

Ron became increasingly horrified as he read the story, which was an extremely graphic Draco/Ginny fiction. When Draco told Harry to take a look, Ron did his best to stop him. "No, Harry, you don't want to see this! It's…"

"It's what, Ron?" Harry asked. "Very funny? I'd like to see what Draco's laughing about." Harry soon realized his mistake.

Suddenly the doorbell rang. Downstairs, Daniel Granger, who was watching the beginning of a football game on the television, rose from the couch and went to answer the door. Hermione decided to tiptoe downstairs and see who the guest was.

Mr. Granger opened the door to see two men dressed in unfamiliar robes, but Hermione, watching from the base of the stairs, sensed that the men were wizards. She suddenly had a sense of foreboding and attempted to Apparate out to the back yard. She was blocked.

As the wizards entered the house, Hermione dashed upstairs. "They're coming for us! The Aurors are after us!" Everyone looked up.

"What happened?" Harry asked calmly.

"There were two wizards at the door," Hermione said anxiously, "They were wearing American Auror uniforms. I think they intercepted one of the letters, or something. We have to get out of here now!"

Harry and Draco tried to Apparate, and found that there were anti-Apparation wards around the house.

Hermione quickly drew her wand and pointed it at the only door. "_Colloportus!_" There were muffled footsteps running up the stairs, followed by a muffled "_Alohomora! Reducto!_" The door shattered inward and the Aurors burst in, charging towards John. John ducked away and quickly ran to hide behind Hermione. The two Aurors pointed their wands at Hermione.

One Auror drew a roll of parchment from his robe and handed it to Hermione. She took it with one hand and unrolled it; it was an arrest warrant for John Granger.

"As you can see," the Auror said, "we are here to serve an arrest warrant. Whoever you are, you must step aside. John Granger knows too much and must be Obliviated to protect national security."

"I know my cousin," Hermione said, remaining still. "He won't tell anyone."

"But he might someday be forced to tell," the Auror replied. "We have orders from the Department of Magic to Obliviate this Muggle. I will cast Obliviate on the count of three whether you step aside or not."

"One!"

"Hermione," John whispered, looking up at her, his eyes glistening, "please don't let them…"

"Two!" the Auror barked angrily.

Hermione dashed forward, tackling both Aurors to the ground simultaneously, snatching the lead Auror's wand out of his hand. Harry, Ron, and Draco accepted the decision and drew their wands. Draco pointed his wand at the second Auror, who was struggling with Hermione, and cast a silent Disarming Spell. However, the spell took away not the Auror's wand, but rather pulled a knife from his belt and into Draco's hand. The first Auror tried to grab John. "Help!" John screamed. "Don't let them take me away!" The Auror quickly pulled out a small pistol-shaped weapon and pointed it at John, pulling the trigger. A red beam, identical to the Stunning Spell, shot from the gun like a bullet and hit John, knocking him unconscious.

After several Disarming Spells, Harry, Ron, and Draco had managed to pull away all of the other Auror's weapons, which included a Stunning Spell gun, the knife, a nightstick, an Auror badge (which apparently had sharp weapons and was thus mistaken for a weapon by the Disarming magic), and a seemingly useless small pink pebble. But miraculously the man still had his wand. He started to say a spell: "_Cambilan—"_ He was interrupted by a Stunning Spell from Ron, which hit him in the chest. However, despite the incomplete incantation, a gray jet of light emerged from his wand and hit Hermione in the face.

Hermione saw her surroundings spin rapidly and blur until the figures around her disappeared and everything became gray. She felt as if she were falling slowly in a void. She looked down at herself and saw nothing there. Finally, she felt something solid against her back—and suddenly she could see something other than gray; quickly looking around, she found herself in a bed inside a small, nicely furnished room.

Meanwhile, Harry, Ron, and Draco quickly dispensed with the two Aurors and looked upon what appeared to them to be Hermione's unconscious body. "Hermione! Hermione, wake up!" Ron grabbed her shoulders and shook her lightly. She slowly opened her eyes, looking about in confusion.

"Where is this place?" she asked, looking at the three boys. Then she saw the bound and unconscious Aurors lying on the ground and became slightly frightened. "What do you want?"

"Shh! Hermione, it's okay. The Auror used some kind of spell on you, but Draco cut him off before he could finish…"

"Why are you calling me Hermione?" she asked. "And who are you, anyway? My name is Joanne Rowling." The three boys looked at each other, shock and worry etched on their faces…

_Rowling…Isn't that the Muggle who wrote those books? But if she's here, where's Hermione?_


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

--December 2, 2000 (Continued)--

"That Auror's spell must have messed up her mind," Draco suggested.

"We should take her to--" Harry stopped just short of saying "St. Mungo's" as he realized that they were on the other side of the Atlantic. "Let's find a wizarding hospital somewhere around here!"

"This place isn't safe, though. I don't think she's in any physical danger--let's just get back to London. And we should take John with us, he's in danger here too."

"But then we'd be breaking the law more--John's not supposed to know--"

"But we can't just leave him here to get Obliviated. Obliviating is hard to do precisely, they might wipe out his other memories too..."

Joanne listened to the strange men talking in front of her and her brow wrinkled in more confusion. _Wizarding? Obliviated? What is that supposed to mean?_

Harry and Ron started to pick Hermione's body up to Apparate. "Hey, where are you taking me?" Joanne demanded anxiously.

"We're taking you to St. Mungo's," Ron explained. "You've been hexed with a mind-altering spell. The Healers hopefully can get you back to normal."

"I haven't been hexed with a spell," Joanne said. "There's no such thing as magic...What's St. Mungo?"

The three magicians ignored her as they Apparated off with a _crack_.

--Later that day--

The Healer looked up at Ron with a somber face. "It seems that your wife was hit by a body-switching spell," she said. "Someone else's soul has been planted in your wife's body, and vice versa. We can reverse the spell if we have access to that other person's body. Normally the name of the other person is pronounced along with the incantation of this spell, but we don't know what happens when the spell gets interrupted in mid-cast. Our guess is that somehow, the spell worked and she's been switched with a witch named Joanne Rowling. We've searched the Ministry of Magic archives to see if we canfind any records fora Joanne Rowling, but we can't. Until we locate that person, I'm afraid there's nothing we can do."

When Ron told Harry what the Healer had said, however, Harry quickly realized what had happened. "Of course they can't find a witch named Joanne Rowling," Harry exclaimed, "She's a Muggle, not a witch!"

"But that means Hermione's been trapped in a Muggle body, then?" Ron said, finally figuring it out.

"Yes. I think we'd best try and find out where Rowling lives. That's probably where Hermione will be."

--December 3, 1998--

"Wow, I never knew about this place," Joanne said. "I could write a book about this! I bet that would sell really well..."

"It probably would," Harry agreed, as he knew that it actually already had. "But we need your help, Joanne. Our friend, Hermione, was hit by a magic spell that made her switch bodies with you. I know it sounds incredible, but it's true. Now, in order to get you back into your body, we need to find it first. Can you take us to where you live?"

"I live in Portugal," Joanne said. "I don't know the way from here, but if you can take me to Lisbon, then I can show you the way from there."

"Deal." Harry stood up, taking Joanne's (really Hermione's) hand and drawing his wand to Apparate. Ron did the same. "Wizards can travel most places by Apparating," Harry explained, "It's basically just teleportation. It might be a bit disorienting for you, though. Hang on." The three of them disappeared with a _Crack!_

After landing in Lisbon's wizarding section, Harry and Ron found their way to the Muggle portion of the city. Joanne flagged down a taxi and gave the driver directions to her apartment. None of them had any Portuguese currency on them--Joanne's Muggle money was with her own body--but Harry offered the driver two Galleons. The driver, happy to be paid in gold, let them go.

Joanne led Ron and Harry up flights of stairs to her apartment door. "I don't have the key on me," she said.

"That's no problem," Ron replied. "Wizards can open doors with magic." Ron pulled out his wand again, pointed it at the doorknob, and whispered "_Alohomora!_" He then easily turned the doorknob and pushed open the door. Almost immediately afterward came the sound of running footsteps, and as the door opened a heavyset, bearded Portuguese man arrived at the doorway.

"Who are you?" he demanded, looking at the three people who had opened his door. "And how the hell did you unlock my door?" Harry, Ron, and Joanne were all taken aback, especially Joanne.

"But this...this is my-it's my apartment," Joanne said quietly, confused, but sure that she was right.

"What do you mean?" the man asked, in his thick accent. "I've never seen any of you around. I've lived here for more than a year. This is my apartment." With that he shut the door, the slam of the heavy wooden piece echoing through the stairwell. Joanne's eyes shimmered as she held back tears of confusion. She had gone to sleep in this very apartment two days ago, then woken up not only in a witch's body, but also apparently in a different dimension where this apartment belonged to someone else. She had lost all of her meager possessions along with her home and had nothing left but the clothes of another person on her back.

"You can stay with me until we figure this out," Ron said. Joanne smiled gratefully and simply nodded; she had nowhere else to go. The three of them made their way back to wizarding London, where Ron had managed to purchase a medium-sized but well-furnished house with Hermione. Along the way, since they used the floo from the Leaky Cauldron, Ron explained the basics of the wizard floo network.

They got to Ron's house safely, although Joanne didn't land very gracefully out of the fireplace and ended up sprawled out face-down on the carpet. Ron tried to serve dinner, which was slightly burnt (Hermione had usually done the cooking over the past three years) and crispy, but edible. It was at this time that Joanne noticed a calendar hanging on the opposite wall from her seat. It was flipped to "December 1998".

"Why is your calendar marked 1998?" Joanne started to ask, but suddenly the horrible truth occurred to her. "Oh my God, don't tell me it is 1998...is it?"

"Well..." Harry paused on seeing her distraught expression, "for us, today is December 3, 1998. What year were you thinking?"

"1991...October 4, 1991. Two days ago I went to bed in that apartment--the one I showed you today--and woke up the next morning in that room with the two dead people, wearing these robes. That was yesterday, wasn't it? December 2, 1998?"

Harry and Ron nodded solemnly. A burst of inspiration suddenly struck Harry and he spoke quickly: "Wait a minute! Joanne got switched from her own time period to a different one--ours. Then maybe Hermione is stuck in 1991 now?"


	6. Chapter 6

"Sounds likely enough," Ron agreed.

"But here's our problem," Harry continued thinking, "Logically, we have to find Joanne's body right now, and then switch them back. But we've no idea where to look… or wait—"

"Actually we might," the same idea occurring to Ron and Harry at the same time, "Since she's famous among Muggles, we should be able to get her address from Muggle sources."

"Yeah, we can use the Internet thing her cousin showed us, we just need a computer…"

A few hours later they were sitting at a public computer in a Muggle public library. Harry opened the Internet Explorer icon (as John had taught them) and typed "JK Rowling" in the address bar (not having learned Google, he was inadvertently using MSN instead, which nevertheless worked).

--December 6, 2000--

The sun was rising in the east as three small cracks sounded in front of a nice house in Edinburgh which the heroes had deduced, after some frustration and a covert peek at Muggle British government files, to be the current primary residence of "Joanne K. Rowling". Harry, Ron, and Joanne appeared out of thin air, the two men holding Joanne for a moment to allow her to steady herself from the Apparation. Then Harry put out his hand and knocked on the door.

Joanne looked on with great trepidation which turned to instant shock mixed with relief when the door was opened and she saw who was there…

"Harry! Ron!" The house's owner rushed forward and wrapped the two men in a giant hug; she obviously recognized them. "I haven't seen you for so many years!" Watching the scene, Joanne had the strange (and correct) feeling of watching herself from the outside; the woman who lived in this house was a bit older than she was, but unmistakably the same person.

Then that woman looked up, and saw Joanne. For a moment she froze, but she recovered and stepped up to Joanne, holding out her hand. "You must be Joanne Rowling," she said kindly. Joanne felt quite weird making eye contact with her own self, but she nodded yes and shook her own hand using a hand that wasn't her own. It was even more disconcerting as she listened to her own voice, issuing from the smiling figure in front of her: "Nice to meet you, Joanne. I'm Hermione Granger, as you may have guessed. Come inside, we've got a lot to discuss." Thus invited into a house that already belonged to her under Muggle law, Joanne followed the wizards in.

"So what's happened to you these last years?" Harry asked, once they were all comfortably seated in the living room.

"Well, I've apparently been thrown back in time," Hermione said, "I woke up in an apartment in the Muggle section of Lisbon, Portugal – sound familiar?" It did, of course. "I managed to find my way to London, but my magic was gone completely, I couldn't find any of the wizarding places anymore. I tried the phone at the Ministry of Magic entrance, but it wouldn't let me in, it was just an ordinary pay phone to me. I even tried the pillar at King's Cross, got some stares when I hit my head on the wall. I figured out there was time travel involved from the calendars I saw, so I knew going to my parents or the Dursleys would be pointless, and I looked completely different in any case.

"Since I was stuck in muggle form, with no access to any magic libraries or anything, I couldn't research a solution. I figured you guys would figure it out though, and then you should be able to travel back in time and put me back. So I waited. And you never came… I knew I had to at least stay alive until you found me. Once I saw what my new name was, it was pretty obvious how to do it. After all, we couldn't have seen any of the books about us without someone writing them first, and it seemed I was supposed to be the person.

"I didn't want to do that at first, though, since I would be violating all the secrecy laws. I worked a few menial jobs and got an apartment in London. Somehow I knew it wasn't going to work, even though I had to try, and of course without any Muggle skills there wasn't anywhere I could really go. I was broke after a few years, and I calculated when I would be forced to start writing to stay alive.

"I figure I'm actually helping to keep the wizarding world secret this way. Think about it from a Muggle perspective: What are the chances of a real world existing that somehow exactly matches the details of some individual author's imagined fantasy? By writing about our world and publishing it as fiction, we ensure that the Muggles won't ever believe that any of it could possibly be a fact – and that's exactly what the wizards want, right?

"So I wrote. I found a publisher, sold the story of our adventures, and made a living. I remembered to avoid those places where there had been Death Eater attacks, and I guess it's not too bad being without magic once you get used to it. Knowing you would come eventually helped a lot too. It kept me going a lot of times in the first few years."

"Well, sorry we took so long," Harry said, "I guess we could go back in time now and change the timeline if you wanted…"

"No, it's alright," Hermione answered, "It's all in the past already. As far as you're concerned, you got to me within a week, so that's good. I'm just still eager to go home though… and get this young lady," she gestured to Joanne, "home as well."

"Well then, St. Mungo's said they could do it, they just need to see both of you. Shall we go?"

They stood, and Harry and Ron apparated back to London, taking Joanne and Hermione along with them.

--Later that day--

"There we go," The two women were now restored to their proper selves, though Joanne had now skipped several years of her life. As Professor Flitwick conjectured, the American auror had misused the soul-switching spell, which normally requires the subjects to be cooperative. The auror had only gotten one of the two incantations out before being stunned, resulting in a number of possibilities for random effects, including the second target of the spell being left unspecified. The time warp, Flitwick believed, was a fluke, caused by an uncontrolled invocation of magic, and would be difficult to reverse. Joanne did not mind, since she apparently was now quite well-off. Hermione had managed her life as well as she would have wanted, and had left her a house, a reasonable financial state, and an excellent and famous reputation.

The three magicians left Joanne at her "new" home, having answered some of her curious questions about how the rest of Harry's adventures went, and after swearing her to secrecy. The next three Harry Potter books, though, were to be truly Joanne's own work. She had the wizards' permission to take any artistic license she wished on the true story, which she did.

When Draco read the seventh of the books, for example, he noted that his father had been portrayed as somewhat less competent and devoted to the Dark Side than he really was. At Hogwarts, when Dumbledore was shown a copy, he was amused to learn of his own "death", as he had been key to the Final Battle, being at the Ministry on official business at the time of Voldemort's attack. It was in the successful defense of the Ministry that the war had really been decided, as the Aurors remained on the Order's side and Voldemort was trapped by the timely restoration of wards. Harry commented that the epilogue was a bit too early, trying to predict seven years into the future – though he had helped Joanne a bit by telling her the names he and Ginny had picked for their children.

Tom Riddle was the luckiest. Having not been evil enough to actually succeed in taking over the Ministry, the list of his sins had been shortened considerably by his premature defeat – enough so that he was permitted to serve his penance as a ghost, preaching the virtues of tolerance and forgiveness to those who might be tempted to emulate him. He also became a guest lecturer on the Dark Arts at many wizarding schools worldwide, for despite his death he remained the preeminent world authority in that subject.

The Ministry of Magic was initially unhappy to learn of Joanne's works, but in the end they saw the benefits of being fictionalized among Muggles, and allowed her to continue to promote wizard secrecy. Her books, in fact, sold so well in the wizarding world – with many traveling to Muggle bookstores to buy copies – that Hermione ended up writing her own version of Harry's adventures as well. She feared that unless they kept the record straight, the fictionalized legend of Harry might well overshadow the real person and his real accomplishments.

The End


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